Thursday, August 7, 2014

Can a mother separate herself from her very womb, the secret place that sheltered the creation of life?... Where mama spoke in whispers and prayers to her unborn. Emotional, tired, ready for  birth. Birth, breath, beginnings that continue to grow outside the womb.

Is there such a thing as a web of a womb outside the body? If so, I still carry my children there. A thick web. My children move, grow, mature, and even have children of their own...but somehow, someway, they are in a womb that they are totally unaware of. Sometimes, I don't feel the kicks, and deep rolls. Then there are times that those kicks and rolls thunder. I hold myself at night tight, in fetal position, whispering prayers for my born, for my second generation born, for my pre-self born aging parents. Pregnant in thought, burdens, hopes. I know....I know... Don't go with the what ifs and the should ofs. Fruitless labor pains. I want the real thing. No false labor. So, when does a mama birth her own from the outer womb? Or does she? Is this something that transcends the natural? I think not at this point. I would say, I'm in the latter part of the second trimester. Full, feeling every kick and roll looking forward to birth.

Addendum. Yes, I know the answer... is the spiritual transcends the natural..I know. I know.. but still I can feel how I feel...